First Tournament of the Year

Last weekend was my first tournament of the 2025 calendar year. I refereed 13 games of varying levels of age and competitiveness. My first game of the weekend was a 17U ladies' clash between two local clubs. It felt good to have a whistle in my hand again for outdoor soccer! The game was fast-paced, with plenty of scoring. The coach's ire heightened due to a shortened clock - but we were trying to squeeze 300 matches into a weekend. I was also the Assistant Referee for a U-14 gentlemen's match. I don't recall much about it, I had a couple of Offside infractions to call. But it was a gentle entry into a cram-packed tournament weekend.

I had the whistle on four U-11/U-12 matches on Saturday. Unfortunately, my yellow cards also got a workout. During my third whistle, a player uninvolved in the play ran up to delay the restart of the free kick. I ordered him back, telling him to pretend he knew what 10 yards was. He challenged me on the issue, telling me the offensive player had to 'ask.' The parents and supporters of his team egged him on. Frustrated, I booked him for delaying the restart. I then stepped off the proper distance. During the same match, with under 30 seconds to play, a player committed a silly and careless foul. I blew the whistle, thinking about cautioning him for the foul. But, since cards did not accumulate, I was going to let it go. He then argued the call with me. His number found its way into my match report for a caution. I also had to award a penalty during this match for a quite silly challenge.

A Mentor Arrives

Following the match, one of the parents is also a referee mentor. This was the first time I'd had a mentor observe me on the whistle. He asked me to talk him through the key match decisions. The first bit of advice he gave me was to make sure that when signaling a penalty, I put plenty of gas in my whistle. The second had to do with positioning. He asked me to grade my match, and I called it a B+ mostly because I knew I was out of position in the middle of the field. He upgraded me to an A- because it was my fourth match.

Sunday started strong! The mentor saw me again, and the only nitpick he had for my match was that I had picked my pink kit for the day. This was only a problem because the 9-year-old girl's team was in pink. He pointed out no one should mistake me for a 9-year-old girl but we also want to make sure we don't wear one of the club's primary colors if we can help it. He also pointed out that if his only point was that, I must have done an A+ job.

How Not To Act

The remainder of the games that day went smoothly, until the last game. And folks, please don't be the parents who fight other parents in the stands.

During the U-9 Boys Cup Final between <redacted> and <redacted>, the parents had not segregated themselves in the viewing area by club. Having not had any issues all tournament with parents, I had no issue with this situation when we started the match. In fact, it appeared that all the parents were good to cheer their sides together when we did a World Cup-style walk-out for the cup final so the parents could take photos of their kids.

Around 20 minutes into the first half of the match, I heard one male spectator who I assume was from <redacted> yell at a male spectator who I presume was from <redacted>, "You're just upset that your kid's getting his ass kicked." The comments drew my attention and I saw two grown men standing nose to nose as if they were ready to start fighting. I used my whistle, and ordered them to separate, hoping to restore order to the sidelines. I was ignored. I then signaled for the coaches from each side to come across because I was not going to allow the two would-be combatants to remain pitchside.

As I was pointing the two gentlemen to the coaches, a female spectator, who I do not know which club she was affiliated with, told me, "No, he needs to fucking leave. He's the fucking problem." With her use of profanity on the sidelines near the 9U field, I directed the coaches to remove her from the pitch as well.

I had a conference with the coaches because I was not sure what the restart should be because I lost track of what happened before the near melee erupted. We agreed on a dropball to <redacted> in <redacted>'s defensive third. In the name of sportsmanship, I asked the <redacted> player to knock the ball downfield to the <redacted> goalkeeper, so no one gained an advantage either way.

As I was preparing to restart, one of the men who had been told to vacate the sideline was still pitch side, though near the football uprights. I told him again we were not restarting the match while he was there. He told me his wife was gathering their things. I told him that was fine, I'm sure she was capable since he was not assisting her, and that I would not restart the match until he was in the parking lot. He finally acquiesced.

Conclusion

It was a good weekend. I got off schedule a bit, but part of that was due to the fact that the window between games was very narrow. Now, I’m ready for the next one to get here!